*Author's Note*
" The best type of the worst type of governments is democracy. All formats of politics are ridiculous and out of control, however there's always a best of the worst and its not going to change anytime soon. And so I bring myself to a point where there’s indeed an urge to compose a rather simplistic, yet parallel response acknowledging the current, growing, almost virtually poposturous event of politics and the obstacles it continuously throws at us."
They used to say everyday
That springs and oceans would play
But the new manner I feel
Gave me a violent delay
Hope is such an irony,
We die in reality
We will always fade away
My sister would think about…
But now we‘re filled with doubt
Trees around me dismantled
Root to the ground of exile
The ground I stand on is whiffed
Flowers in a dark pile
The sun above us is red
And all hopes of life are dead.
In the author's note I thin kyou want the word "proposterous", not "imposturous".
ReplyDeleteThe author's note is an excellent addition to the text. Perhaps you could speak to what you are trying to do with this format, poetry. For example, why open form? Are there any semantic devices you are employing? What effect are you after by spacing the lines the way you did? You get the idea.
This was a sad poem. I find that most of your poems are sad but, you thrive at them. Keep it up!
ReplyDeleteI like this poem ending. It really sums up the whole point that you were trying to get across. And I like your vocabulary choice; it's very rich.
ReplyDeleteThis is a very unique yet sad poem. I like how you threw your opinion out and then backed it up with a neat poem. In a way it reminded me of a persausive essay. I liked this piece a lot. Good job.
ReplyDeleteAs a few people said, this poem is sad. You really played into those sad parts though and it worked very well.
ReplyDeleteI liked the idea behind the poem. It was well written as almost a deterrent for poor governmental leaders.
ReplyDelete